I climbed up the stairs angrily, reaching the terrace. "Not a single day can go peacefully," I huffed.
No, I didn't fight with anyone.
I got scolded for no reason at all.
By pops.
I seriously hate this thing in brown families. Just because you're the smallest member of your family, you'll be the best target for everyone to release their frustration. It doesn't matter if it's your fault or not. They will eventually twist it in a way to give you the award.
And if you dare to question back?
Another award of 'Battameez' (rude)
I walked back and forth on the terrace, calming myself down, and took out my phone, staring at the message Murat sent me 37 mins ago.
After mentally debating I texted him, 'Im free'
'Calling in 2 minutes', his reply came after a few seconds.
I got lost in gazing at the stars while sitting at the chair, when my phone starts vibrating.
"Hello?" I answered the call in a heavy voice.
Yeah, I cried.
"Ji" (yeah) I close my eyes as his voice melts in my ear.
"Hmm"
"Work done?"
"Yeah done," I said in a monotone.
"Dinner?"
"Nope"
"Why?"
"Lost my appetite," I tried my best to keep my voice normal.
"Why is your voice so heavy? Are you crying?"
"Nope," I bit my lip with a heavy throat.
"What happened?" his voice got softer with every second.
"Nothing new. Just...family thing" I sniffed, shrugging my shoulders.
"Did anyone said something to you?"
"You know, getting scolded.....for no reason at all?? It just pisses me off."
"Who scolded you?"
"Papa"
"Oh. It happens."
"Yeah."
"But don't skip dinner because of it. You'll sleep hungry?"
"I don't know. I'll see. Have a mug of milk around midnight maybe."
"Yeah. Don't sleep without having anything. Where are you?"
"Terrace"
"Are you still crying?"
"Nah. I'm not" I sniffed.
"Your voice tells something else."
My heart swells up at how he can tell something is wrong just by my voice. I sniffed and wiped my tears.
"Hayat?" his voice made me close my eyes again.
"Hmm?"
"It's okay"
"Hmm. Yeah. Anyways. What are you doing?" I sat up straight.
"Just finished my work, and a deal with a client."
"Achha."
.
.
"Are you serious?" I laughed.
"Seriously" he chuckled.
It had been 15 minutes of his lame jokes and our stupid talks, the conversation drifted from one topic to another.
"Anyways, where did we stop at our discussion in the evening?" I asked him.
"We were....," He replied, his voice lost in thoughts, "Where were we?"
I chuckled at his response.
"Oh yes. Past present and future" I remembered finally.
"Yeah that"
"I think, one gets tensed because he stresses about tomorrow which isn't in his control."
"So we shouldn't worry about tomorrow?"
"No. I didn't mean that. You should worry about things that ARE in your hands. Not about the things which AREN'T in your control. Leave them up to the Almighty. He's the best planner of all"
"Listen to me. First of all, the Almighty has created the pair of husband and wife with his own hands. If our names aren't written together, no matter how much we will try, we can never become one."
"That's true."
"And if our names are written together, no matter whichever part of the globe we are in, we will eventually become one. Okay?"
"I know that"
"Second of all, why should we worry about the thing Almighty has promised us about?"
"You're the one who's stressing about it." I chuckled.
"Nah, I'm not"
"Then?"
"I'm thinking about the outcomes of holding someone's hand. Either you'll be together forever, or you'll have to separate, which will lead to crying and stuff. So what's the benefit of watching that crybaby scene? Because it leads to breaking one's heart. And a girl definitely curses the boy who breaks her heart."
I cleared my throat, listening to him quietly.
"And when that guy works hard for his career and is about to accomplish the goal or reach success, something happens due to which he fails or doesn't gets it.
Why does that happen? Did he hurt someone, or snatched someone's rightful thing, or what?
Or vo is cheez ko bhul jata hai ki peeche ek laundiya ka dil tod ke bhaga"(He forgets that once upon a time he ran away after breaking a girl's heart.)
"That's where understanding comes-" I start to speak but he cuts me off.
"Listen to me, there's this one hadeeth- Wait dad is calling, stay on hold."
"Okay"
'The person you're speaking with has put your call on hold. Please stay on the line,' the lady's voice echoed from the other side.
I put my phone down in my lap as the line went silent, putting it on the speaker to know if he comes back, and got lost in my thoughts.
Was he thinking about what I said in the evening and coming up with the answers lol?
I shook my head and gaze up at the stars.
Two minutes went by, and I heard his voice from the speaker, "Yeah hello?"
"Yeah"
"So, there's this one hadeeth, 'If you made someone happy for the sake of Almighty, then Almighty will make sure to make you happy'. "
"Yeah I know this hadith."
"Yeah... So..."
"And the other meaning of this is, 'If you made someone unhappy, Almighty wouldn't spare you'. "
"Yeah. Now tell me. Where's the benefit of making someone cry?"
"Hmmm. Point." I nodded.
"When the Almighty has taken responsibility and said, 'I've made you in pairs', then why should we stress about it? Why should we try to convince our parents for our marriage?
If Almighty has written us as a pair we would end up together anyhow. Because matches are made in heaven. Every other relation was made on earth, except husband and wife. Adam and Eve were made in heaven, but their family started on earth. That's why no other relationship is more beautiful than a relation of husband and wife."
Silence crossed between us again.
"Nikah ka matlab pata hai tumhe?" he spoke after a minute.
(Do you know what Nikah means?)
"Kya hota hai?" I asked nonchalantly.
(What it means?)
"Mere hisab se Nikah ka matlab hota hai....ek tareeke se do jism ek jaan. Kisi me mil jana. Kisi me ghul jana. Jese barish pad rahi hai asman pe se, or zameen ne use pee lia. Is tareeke ko nikah kehte hain. Ki jaan me jaan ajana." his description of nikah sent me into my hopeless land of romanticism.
(I believe, nikah is more like two bodies with one soul. To get dissolved in someone else. Like raindrops falling from the sky and getting absorbed in the soil. This symbolizes Nikah. To get refreshed, eased, and comforted by that person. You find peace in them. They are your home.)
"Hmmm"
"Such a beautiful name and promise is given by the Almighty, then why should we worry about it? Why don't people understand? Why run away after one another? And why do they say put some effort?"
The last line was meant for me.
But I didn't said anything.
Because I knew he was right.
But something was missing, I still had one doubt that I can't put my finger on.
"First tell me who's taking stress?" I spoke after a minute.
"I'm making you understand."
"I don't take any stress about it."
"No, you said, we have to add efforts, convince the family."
"Because the almighty uses people as a means to make things happen."
"Yeah you're correct about that but-"
"We have to go through a process to make things happen, right?"
Yes, that's what was the missing puzzle.
"If two names are written together, they will automatically start talking with each other. Their families will somehow get into contact through someone, and start having good family relations amongst them."
Okay.
So he's telling me to go and chill, and have an arranged marriage.
Noice
I kept quiet as he carried on with his thoughts, "So we shouldn't worry about these things. Listen, the Almighty made our hearts in a way that gets attached to others,"
"Hmm"
"Okay. Second thing is, when we meet someone new, and we feel like we've met this person before, or how our bond got so great in sucha short period of time, it has a reason behind it. When the Almighty made our souls, he kept them in a place called 'Aalam-e-Arwah'."
"Achha." My interest peeked at this new information I was getting.
I didn't know about that.
"According to the hadeeth, the Prophet Muhammad said, that the people who were closest to you in the vicinity of 'Aalam-e-arwah', will also be close to you in this world. So the closer a soul was to you, the closer their relationship will be with them in this world, as in your family, friends, relatives, and maybe your spouse also," he explained briefly.
"Achha. That's why we click with some people instantly." I concluded.
"Yes."
Our topics went on from one to another, including like one-sided love, loyalty, etc, and soon shifted to talking shit about girls again.
Not me this time.
Just him.
Idk if it's because of his friends' fiancees or some exes, but they have totally ruined the picture of a decent girl.
And especially, the concept of love and a relationship.
Love gives you peace of mind, not tension. And certainly couldn't be forgotten easily. People have misunderstood attraction as love and hence, when the spark of attraction fades, they think they don't love them anymore.
Bro, there's a fine line between liking someone, and loving someone. You can like someone A LOT. Definitely a lot, and that will fade soon. But once you fall in love with someone, there's no going back. It will take years to move on, and yeah you will move on, but forget? Never.
You will always end up comparing other people with that person, or thinking about him in the end. You just can't shake off the thought of that person and would stop finding other people attractive, no matter how beautiful that person might be.
We talked a lot.
Literally.
So I will just sum up for you with brief dialogues.
He thinks girls claim they love someone but if couldn't talk with him for a few days, so they will end up getting bored and finding a new guy for leisure time.
And I laughed mockingly at that.
"This is bullshit. She doesn't even know the real meaning of that word.
And first of all, whoever says I can't live without you, that's a completely unrealistic thing, because we as humans don't need another human to survive," I said.
"Yeah, that's true. But that's what the senti-lovers say all the time"
"They are idiots. Second of all, she mistook attraction as love."
"Do you know the meaning of love? Okay, tell me what love actually means."
I laughed at his question and could only say, "Achha."
Before I could process my answer, he asked, "should I tell?"
"Hmm, go ahead"
"Mohabbat vo hai, ki tum agar kahi par baithe hue ho, or kisi ke bare me soch rahe ho, to tum use feel karpao ki haa vo mere saath hai. Ye mohabbat hoti hai," he said in his calm and soothing, yet deep voice.
(When you're somewhere, lost in that person's thoughts, you'll feel them close to you, as if they are present around you, that's love.)
I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath.
"Tum ye soch paao, ki haa vo kisi pareshani me hai mera dil keh raha hai, ye mohabbat hoti hai."
(You'll feel it in your heart, that yeah, that person is tensed, or facing some problem. That's what love is.)
"Hmmm," I looked down at my lap.
Does that mean, I'm irrevocably and irresistibly in love with you?
Oh shit.
.
.
.
************

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