"I still see you in every sunset
Let's meet again for the first time."
- Anonymous

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I swipe the clothes hanging in my wardrobe one by one, scanning them all. I was in search of something attractive yet modest. Not too woollen not too light fabric. Spring is approaching but that doesn't mean winter has completely gone. I don't want to freeze up because of cold or sweat due to heat.

Gotta keep it balanced.

Murat and I have been planning to meet since December but every time something comes up, spoiling our plan.

Be it covid curfew or bad weather.
Uff.

Finally after what felt like an eternity, our plan got finalized for the 31st January, i.e. tomorrow.

I hope no obstacle come up this time. The good part is, it will be a Double Date!

Jaylene and her man.
Me and my....man?
Okay.
That was cringy.

Anyways.

I'm a little relieved that Jaylene would be with me. Not because I'm afraid to meet Murat alone, but because I'm afraid of getting lost. I have never stepped out of my locality alone.
Always had some company.
So yeah.

Perks of having strict parents

Anyways, back to double date.
The moment I told Murat about this plan, his first question was, 'will they be with us the whole time?'
Dude is concerned about his kiss lol.
Well, I assured him that we will just have lunch together and part our ways. Yeah, we will be in the same area, because of course I will go back home with her, but our privacy won't be sacrificed.

Well, after a good 10 minute mental debate, I chose a long light-blue shirt and black-white striped full-sleeves mini bodycon with black leggings.

The body-con underneath will serve as a warmer as its fabric is thick enough. But as it's a figure-hugging dress, the shirt will help in covering up as a shrug.

Tight clothes get me uncomfortable in public places. I only prefer one pair of eyes to check me out, not the whole world.

Last but not the least, the black leggings will complete the outfit.
I personally prefer leggings over jeans because they are more comfortable.

Comfort is my top priority.

"Hah! Outfit done," I put my hands on my waist, "Time to select jewelry."

I was looking through my jewelry box when my phone rang.

Bella

"Hello?" I picked up the call while checking out different pair of earrings.

"Yeah." Jaylene replied in a low voice.

"Sup?"

"I won't be coming tomorrow."

"You what?"

"Well, we got into a fight. He was being an asshole don't blame me. So I don't think we will be meeting tomorrow."

I just sat there in shock with a pair of earring hanging in my hand.

"Hayat?" She called my name when received no response.

I blinked my eyes and took a long sigh. "Yaar" (dude)

"Hmm. What can I say. You guys are meeting though. Right?"

"Yeah he is coming but......" My limbs start to get cold thinking about the scenario. "I have never traveled alone Jaylene." I whispered.

"It's easyy. Especially by metro? It's super easy."

"Noo. By metro is super confusing. I don't get the board names or stations or platforms."

"Arey." She chuckled. "Use the app I'm suggesting. Karol Bagh is near. You just need to change one line."

"Exactly. This changing line is the most confusing thing ever. Remember Zoe and I got lost last time? And this time I would be alone!"

"Murat will be with you."

"He will meet me at Karol Bagh na? No no change of plans. I will ask him to come pick me."

"Hayat," she laughed.

"Jaylene," I ended up chuckling with her. Nervousness was eating me out.

"Until when you will keep on traveling with a company. You need to go out alone too."

"Yes but not on the other side of the city."

"Its not even that far."

"For me it is. Oh god! What should I do now?" I sighed, grabbing my head.

"Gosh! This girl..." Jaylene laughed. "Then meet some other day if you are really that scared."

"No no no no no." I sat up straight. "I can't let it postpone again. It's been going since December and I'm fed up of it."

"Then gather up the courage."

I take a deep breath and close my eyes.

Either stay at home like a scaredy cat.
Or meet him tomorrow with all the atom-sized courage I have.

I squeezed my eyelids.

Tum mujhse kya kya karwaoge Murat?
(How many stunts will you make me do, Murat?)

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........

31st January 2022: The Day We Met

Outfit: done
Makeup: done
Hair: done
Bag: ready
Him: not responding
Anxiety: high

"I will break his skull into two," I huffed while looking at my reflection in the mirror.

He has reached Delhi so yes he isn't dumping me but why isn't he responding when will he get free!! And if I should leave the home or not!!!

'Leave,' his text pops up increasing my heartbeat.

'Okay.' I take a deep breath.

Time to finally meet Murat Ahmad.

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My phone rings as I was heading inside the metro station. Without checking the name I picked up because I knew who was calling me.

"Where are you?"

"I'm coming at your station."

"You're still scared?"

"YES I AM."

"It will take more time to reach the destination!"

"I don't care. I'm just coming at your station."

"My station is too big. Where will you find me. Wait. Let me check the route."

"Hmm." I put the phone on speaker. "I even forgot my earbuds." I muttered to myself and checked out the app Jaylene suggested me. "Okay I will have to take this platform. These names are so weird."

"First tell me who are you with?"

"I'm alone I just told you." I put the phone back to ear.

"Then who are you talking to?"

"I'm talking to myself!!" I huffed.

He chuckled. "Great, you talk with yourself too."

"Yes I do!" I jogged through the corridor.
Why is he so annoying?!
I was embarrassed, irritated, scared, laughing, all at once.
And he wasn't helping me much.
(Well, he was kinda by staying on call)

"Ab ye 100 rupee kaha se khulau yaar." (Gosh! Now where do I get a change of 100 bucks.)

"To khule rupee sath rakhne chahiye the na, ameer aadmi." My breath was heavy from all the jogging. (Should have kept a spare change na, you rich ass man.)

"Arey yaar." He laughed. "Ye log UPI kyu nahi le rahe yahan?!" His pissed voice made me chuckle. (Why isn't UPI service available here?!)

What a great start to our day!

He mumbled after a few mins, "Vo kyu nahi aayi tumhare saath. In dono ko bhi abhi ladna tha." (Why didn't she come with you. Gosh! What a great timing for them to fight.)

"Vahi to. Bawle kahi ke."
(Exactly. Idiots.)

I finally reached the ticket counter and walked towards the wall having a big metro map, trying to contemplate the route with him.

"Look, lets meet at ***** stop. I will pick you up from there." He concludes. "You can at least handle that much travelling by yourself na?"

"Yes yes good idea. I'm familiar with that station." I nodded, finally feeling relieved for the first time today.

I bought the ticket and reminded him, "Networks will get messy now. But don't cut the call!"

"Haa haa. Tum ajao bas."
(Yes yes don't worry. Just come quickly.)

And I ran towards the platform as fast as I could.

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"Where are you?" He asked me as I stepped out of the train.

"I'm at the platform," I mumbled as my surroundings were quiet.

"I'm there too. But tell me about your surroundings."

"Umm... stairs?" I laughed while twirling around.

"Stairs are all over here," he mumbled in deep thought.

"I'm at the end of the platform." I kept walking forward.

"Hmmm."

"Oh wait, is that you? Are you wearing a beanie?" I ran my eyes all over the place, examining people around me.

"No."

My blind eyes weren't helping me much as I didn't have my spectacles on.
I'm not habitual of wearing spectacles anyways as it doesn't bother much at home (stupid I know).
But right now I'm really feeling blind by watching all these blurry faces around me.

"What are you wearing?"

"Wearing?" He chuckled. "Umm... I don't know."

"Wow you don't know what you're wearing."

We aren't sexting here boy!

"What about you?"

"I'm in black coat with a yellow scarf and high ponytail." I described every outer detail possible.

"Hmmm. Where are you...." He mumbled. "Oh wait, I found you."

"Oh?" My heartbeat increased as I took a 360 degree turn but couldn't find him in-between the light crowd.

"It's you, right?" his deep voice twisted my stomach as my gaze landed on a guy, wearing all black while talking on the phone, eyes focused on me.

My heart skips a beat.
It's him.

"Um yeah." I cut the call while walking in his direction in small steps.

The guy puts his phone down at the same time, eyes still on me, and walked forward, which makes me 100% sure that it's really Murat and not some random guy I'm about to walk over.

All the scenarios I had imagined in my head started playing over about how I will run and hug him tightly at our first meetup. But welp! I don't have the guts to do this stunt anymore.

Actually I do want to run.
But not into him.
Instead, away from him.
Far far away from him.

"Assalamualaikum," he greeted me as we finally came closer.

"Walaikum assalam," I mumble, not able to meet his eyes. Gathering some atom-sized courage left inside my gut, I tried to initiate the convo, keeping my chill. "So where do we go now?"

I was walking beside him as he checked the map on his phone. That's when I noticed his facial features, and only one question came in my mind.

How can someone be THIS BREATHTAKING?

I could only see his eyes as we both were in masks, but damn!

He has BROWN EYES!

Pictures and videocalls do no justice to them. He had messy hair and a brownish-black beard which was slightly visible from the mask. Also! That all-black combo of turtle neck sweater and pants wasn't helping much.

GOD SAVE ME.

We were almost same height, thanks to my heels, which means he is taller than me without them.

Perfect.

"We have to take this line," he pointed at his mobile screen.

"Which means we have to take the stairs. See! I was going right!"

The awkwardness didn't even lingered for a minute and we were back to our normal self.

We walked around for a while, figuring out the route, jumping from one train to another to check if we are in the right one or not (his crazy idea), and finally catches the right train.

Well, that's what happens when a girl who doesn't go out much (especially alone) meets a guy who lives in another city.

But I was in relief now.
Even if I get lost, I will be lost with him.
Not alone.

I kept standing, grabbing the pole in the moving metro for support, while he sat down on the seats in the corner, meant for two. My innerself got nervous as he gestured me to sit down beside him. Our thighs brushed against each other as I sat beside him, giving me goosebumps.

Okay
I'm sitting beside him.
More like mushed up against him.
Since when did this seat become so small?
Or did I became fat?
Or is he too big?
It must be my thick coat.

I looked down at his fingers as they moved quickly on his phone, switching from one app to another. Finally he closed the screen and looked at me, sitting up straight.

"Ji." (yeah) He smiled.

Our eyes met for a second but I broke off the contact, staring at the empty seats in front of me.

His face was only inches away plus looking at me!

"Hmm." I felt like tongue-tied.

Well, this was getting real awkward.
A few minutes earlier we were bickering like crazy, but now?
TOTAL tongue-tied.

We were quiet throughout the whole ride, but my mind was running in various directions.

The way his leg was brushing against mine at every stop.

The way our whole body was touching sideways.

He felt so warm and comfortable, which urged me to snuggle in his embrace while holding his hand.
But well, my atom-sized courage was out of stock at the current moment.

As we took the exit, he gave me bad news, "I can only stay for an hour."

"What?! An hour?" I looked at him surprisingly. "I thought we had the whole day."

"I didn't even complete the business I came here for and asked my friend to handle it until I come back. So he's waiting." He explained.

"Does he know?" I gestured towards us. "You're with me?"

"No."

"Aamir?"

"Yusuf."

"Oh. But why didn't you completed your work first?" I made a pout.

"Because you kept on pinging me 'Should I leave? Should I leave?' "

"Excuse me? I first texted 'when will you be free?', but no response. How come I'll know what's your situation until you tell me!"

"I didn't know you would take 30 minutes to come!"

It took every ounce in my body to not kill this human being in front of me. Or just break his skull.

Well. We are back at it again.

"If you would have simply told me when you will get free from work, instead of questioning me back, I would have come later." I answer in the most polite and civilized manner possible.

Pinching the bridge of my nose, I took deep breaths to calm myself down.
Don't waste anymore minutes in bickering as we are already short of time.
What's done is done.
Focus on the solution Hayat.
Yes, focus.

I muttered after a few minutes, "So, how long can you stay?"

"Maximum 2 hours that's it." He replied calmly as we walked out of the station.

"Okay. That means we have to look for a hotel nearby." I sum up the situation. "What will I do after you're gone?" I groaned.

"Go home?" He said like it's the most easiest question I couldn't answer.

"I can't! I have told my parents I would be home at 5 or 6 pm. The excuse won't even match. God!" I huffed.

"Look, here are two hotels we can go to," he showed me the screen.

"Hmmmm." I glanced over them. "Okay."

As he was about to stop an E-Rickshaw I grabbed his arm, leaning into him. He was surprised by the sudden move but composed himself quickly.

I whispered in his ear, "Don't mention anything about OYOs or something. Just take the hotel's name as a reference."

We made eye contact with our faces inches apart and he gave me a small nod, stepping back to get a ride.

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It was 2:30 pm and we were lost.
Literally LOST!
And way more irritated than before!

We strolled around in rickshaw, and walked and walked and walked, but couldn't find a suitable hotel.
Either it was creepy or just gave weird vibes.

Another day of regretting wearing heels.

Also, we forgot Karol Bagh is off every Monday.
And today is Monday!
What a lovely coincidence!

Which means not even a medical store was available for the 'important stuff' we had to buy.

"Why didn't you bought it before hand?" I slapped my forehead.

"I thought I will buy it from any medical store available here."

Fate clearly wasn't in our favor today.

I glance at his side profile, noticing his eyes again. The way sunlight was making his brown eyes glisten was heavenly.

"Well it's a good thing anyways, it would have gone to waste." I teased.

"Why?" He eyed me.

We were sitting in a cycle rickshaw, again mushed up against each other, to which I was getting comfortable with each second.
In fact I was LOVING it.

I broke the eye contact again, looking in front.

"Why do you think it won't happen?" He whispered in my ear, referring to the dirty stuff, which gave me goosebumps.

I pressed my lips trying not to smile as he kept on looking at me.

Suddenly an intrusive thought crosses over my mind about the threat he gave me, 'I will kiss you anywhere.'
What if he kisses me in rickshaw?
I wonder what that would be like.

Oh wait.
Do I even want to kiss him?
I glanced at him again as his gaze was focused on the road and my eyes flickered to his smooth pinkish lips.

Well......
It doesn't seem weird to imagine them on mine. In fact it seems appealing, unlike the others. The mere thought usually gross me out of someone sucking my lips. (In-person I'm talking about, not the celebs ofcourse.)

But here? With him?
It feels so natural and normal and okay and.... interesting?
Wow.
So that's what attraction feels like.
Lmao.
I'm rambling in my head.

I need to avert my gaze before he catches me staring at him like a hawk.

Too late.
He senses my unaverting gaze and glance at me, catching me red handed. Blood rushes inside my veins at 10x speed and I quickly look away.

Soon, we got out of the rickshaw and walked some more while following the google map.

"There isn't even a cafe nearby. We could have at least eat something." He huffed.

"I told you from the start let's go to cafe. But nope. Hotel, hotel, hotel." I shrugged. "Look's like we are clowned. Hence, day wasted."

"I think so too." He mumbled with furrowed eyebrows, clearly irritated.

"Finallyy! There's a restaurant." I pointed on the left side of the road after few minutes of walking.

"And a hotel on its side," he smirked at me and quickly walked ahead, leaving me behind.

"Is it..." I mumbled without moving, "...necessary?" but quickly hurried after him. "We can just go and eat, right?" I tried to convince him after catching his pace. "Remember I'm hungry?"

But welp!
He entered the hotel without a second thought and I looked up at the tall building, shaking my head.

"I don't know what's going to happen in there."

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